Myth about anger

Anger is inherited
1. The way we express anger is inherited and cannot be changed. Sometimes, we may hear someone say, I inherited my anger from my father; that s just the way I am. This statement implies that the expression of anger is a fixed and unalterable set of behaviours. Evidence from research studies, however, indicates that people are not born with set, specific ways of expressing anger. These studies show, rather, that because the expression of anger is learned behaviour, more appropriate ways of expressing anger also can be learned. .....
Anger automatically leads to aggression
2. Anger is something that builds and escalates to the point of an aggressive outburst. However, as has been covered in our previous article on Anger Management, anger does not necessarily lead automatically to aggression. Think about it chances are there have been times when you ve felt really angry but it simply hasn t been appropriate to act aggressively, such as at work or when talking to a police officer. If you can control your behaviour at those times, you can control it at others. .....
Anger in an aggressive way people listen and I gain respect
3. While holding in your anger is not healthy and usually only causes you to become angrier, venting anger inappropriately is also not healthy. Expressing yourself in an angry aggressive manner can just make the situation worse. .....
Venting anger is always desirable
4. The popular belief among mental health professionals and laymen was that the aggressive expression of anger, such as screaming or beating on pillows, was healthy and therapeutic. Research studies have found, however, that people who vent their anger aggressively simply get better at being angry. In other words, venting anger in an aggressive manner reinforces aggressive behaviour. .....
Males are angrier than females
5. It,s simply not true that men are angrier than women. Surveys show that women get mad just as frequently as men about once or twice a week on average. On the other hand, men tend to report more intense anger, while women tend to hang on to anger longer. .....
Anger is only a problem when you openly express it
6. 10 percent of people act out their feelings when they get angry. The other 90 percent either suppress their anger ( I don t want to talk about it! ) or repress their anger ( I m not angry at all really! ). People who express their anger are the squeaky wheels who get everyone s attention; people who repress or suppress their anger need anger management just as much.The older you get, the more irritable you are. It s the other way around as people age, they report fewer negative emotions and greater emotional control. People like wine and cheese do tend to improve with age. .....
Anger is all in the mind
7. Emotions are primarily physical in nature. If anger were only a state of mind, why would someone say, I feel like I have a big fist in my chest when I get that angry ? Believe me, when you get mad, that emotion is instantly manifested in muscles throughout your entire body, the hairs on the back of your neck, your blood pressure, your blood sugar levels, your heart rate, your respiration rate, your gut, even your finger temperature (it warms up!) long before you re aware of what s happening. .....
Anger results from human conflict
8. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. One of the leading experts on anger has found that people can get angry by being exposed to foul odors, aches and pains, and hot temperatures none of which involve (or can be blamed on) the actions of others. .....
ANGER IS NOT AN ALL OR NOTHING PHENOMENON
9. Anger typically occurs in degrees, ranging from mild annoyance to intense rage. Some people have a problem labeling negative feelings. They consider any experience of hostility as an intense, urgent crisis, even if it s just a momentary frustration. Such people tend to have an over active inner brat that makes mountains out of molehills. .....
NOT ALL ANGER IS UNHEALTHY OR DESTRUCTIVE
10. Sometimes anger is definitely justified. For example, if you have been betrayed by a friend, or if you have been physically attacked by someone, or if there is a major social injustice these are all times where anger is appropriate. Biologically speaking, anger gets your adrenalin going, and spurs you into action. On the other hand, the hissy fits that people throw over minor irritations are both unhealthy and destructive. Anger has serious implications for your health. Research shows that among all the risk factors for heart disease, chronic anger is the most significant predictor more than smoking, obesity and high blood pressure. Temper tantrums and other fits of anger are rarely useful. In fact, they erode not only people s respect for you, but also your own self respect. .....
Anger is all about getting even
11. The most common motive behind anger has been shown to be a desire to assert authority or independence, or to improve one s image not necessarily to cause harm. Revenge is a secondary motive. A third motive involves letting off steam over accumulated frustrations again with no apparent intent to harm anyone else. .....
Only certain types of people have a problem with anger
12. All types of people truck drivers, college professors, physicians, housewives, grandmothers, lawyers, policemen, career criminals, poor people, millionaires, children, the elderly, people of various colors, nationalities, and religions experience anger. Anger is a universal emotion! .....
ANGER MANAGEMENT DOES NOT MEAN KEEPING YOUR MOUTH SHUT
13. Anger management involves keeping your inner brat from saying or doing something that you ll later regret. It involves calming yourself, making cool headed assessments of the situation, and finally taking sensible action. With practice, this can be accomplished in a matter of seconds. .....
Domestic violence happens only in low income families
14. Domestic violence happens in all kinds of families, rich and poor, urban, suburban and rural, in every part of the country, in every racial, religious and age group. .....
Anger is good
15. When it leads to domestic violence, property damage, drug addiction, ulcers, and self mutilation, anger is definitely not good. .....
Learning to control my anger means I have to hold it in
16. Anger management gives you tools to help you learn to recognize your anger, and then make choices to help express yourself in an appropriate way. The goal is to learn healthy and constructive ways to express anger.Being angry all the time can adversely affect your health. Being chronically angry can make you more susceptible to illnesses such as: diabetes, heart disease, insomnia, increased stress, and a weakened immune system. Chronic anger can affect your mental health. Being angry takes a huge amount of energy and therefore can affect your ability to manage your stress. This can lead to difficulty concentrating, depression and other mental health concerns. Out of control anger can hurt personal and professional relationships and your career .....
IT IS NOT ALWAYS NECESSARY TO LET YOUR ANGER OUT
17. Anger does not work like steam in a teakettle. It is not necessary to release it in order to avoid explosion. While it s true your stress level does increase when you dwell on angry thoughts, you can reduce the stress without having to resort to an outburst or tirade. .....
Domestic Violence is an anger control issue
18. Anger is a tool abusers use to get what they want. We know abusers are actually very much in control because they can stop when someone knocks on the door or the phone rings; they often direct punches and kicks to parts of the body where the bruises are less likely to show; and they are abusing everyone who makes them angry , but waits until there are no witnesses and abuses the one he says he loves. .....
Anger slowly decreases with age
19. The domains of anger between the sexes decreases for those older than 50, although men are still more likely to be aggressive and women are still more likely to have longer episodes of anger. .....
Domestic violence is not really that serious
20. Domestic violence is an illegal act and is considered a crime with serious repercussions. Although there are aspects of domestic violence (example: emotional, psychological, spiritual abuse) that may not be considered criminal in a legal sense, serious and long lasting physical, emotional and spiritual harm can, and often does, occur. Each and every act of domestic violence needs to be taken seriously. .....
Victims provoke their partners violence
21. Whatever the problems exist in a relationship, the use of violence is never justifiable or acceptable. There is NO EXCUSE for domestic violence. .....
Anger management programs are briefer
22. Briefer and less expensive than certified batterer intervention programs, anger management programs are not effective to address the deep rooted issues of batterers. .....
Anger and Disappointment
23. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. One of the leading experts on anger has found that people can get angry by being exposed to foul odors, aches and pains, and hot temperatures none of which involve (or can be blamed on) the actions of others. .....
Domestic violence abusers can t control their anger
24. Most abusers manage their anger very well everywhere except at home or with their partners. Domestic violence isn t about anger. It s about entitlement, power and control. An abuser will only stop his behavior if he attends treatment that is specifically designed to challenge his attitude of entitlement, hold him accountable for his violence, and teach him how to change his choices and actions. .....
People with anger problems speak and act before they think
25. Everybody has to think first to be able to speak and act. However, the first thought of people with anger problems is to want to judge or punish. This leads to problem behaviour. They just don t take the time to check out their thinking and what it makes them do. .....
Conflict frustration and anger cause violence
26. Ill tempered people experience conflict and frustration at times without becoming violent. Violence is a choice. .....
Anger problems is often thought to be genetically inherited
27. These problems often run in families, but are the results of learning unhealthy habits of thinking and behaviour. .....
Anger and aggression are natural for humans
28. humans are born with a basic instinct for anger and aggression has been used to explain just about everything from marital arguments to global warfare.The thinking here is that instinctual biological pressures can push people past some built in anger threshold.The instinctive, natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively.Anger is a natural adaptive response to threats; it inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival. .....
Frustration always leads to aggression
29. frustration leads to aggression was made by the famous Sigmund Freud, who believed that individuals are born with an innate aggressive instinct.This idea that frustration leads to aggression received quite a bit of research support back in the 1950s and 60s, but we now know that aggression is not the only behavior that can follow frustration and hurt.For instance, many Tibetan people were suddenly displaced from their homeland after the Chinese invaded Tibet in 1952. Most of these people now live in exile. , .....
A person s anger is caused by others
30. Anger experts say that they consistently notice that angry clients come into therapy with one or more reasons to explain and justify why they are so angry.As soon as you decide that someone else is responsible for your hurt or physical tension, the focus shifts from you to them. You can then feel justified in releasing your pain and hurt with anger directed toward those you believe to be responsible for it.Anger is triggered by people and events outside your control. However, how you react to your anger thoughts and feelings is up to you shifting the blame to others, you rob yourself of the opportunity to make changes in your behavior .....
Isolated occurrence due to anger or stress
31. Battering is a pattern of control that includes the repeated use of a number of tactics including threats, intimidation, isolation, economic and financial control, psychological and sexual abuse. Physical violence is only one of the tactics used to control another person. .....
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